5 Things I Dread Beyond All Reason

 (Psst. Wrote this months ago, forgot to post it. My apologies!)

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(Image source)

 

I experience a lot of irrational, out-of-proportion dread. So I spend days (or years) putting off anything uncomfortable… Such as:

 

1) Wriggling into sports bras…

…or anything with a built in shelf bra. Yeeeesh, I hate that feeling. But even if things go horribly wrong, this can’t take more than a minute. Why let it worry me so much?  Back-clasp sports bras can save you that claustrophobic, wrestling-with-spandex feeling, but it’s hard to get them tight enough to do their job.

 

2) Checking voicemail

I have been known to avoid voice messages for days on end. This makes no sense; even if the messages were terrible news— terrible news rarely gets better when one avoids it.

 

3) Driving

I just turned 28 and still do not have a driver’s license. No, I do not live in a major city with an outstanding mass transit system. I live in a sprawling town with a few pokey buses. Being a non-driver has never been easy, never been convenient, never ceased embarrassing me.

 

4) Figuring out taxes

In a ‘personal best’ feat of denial, I successfully avoided thinking about gross receipts taxes for more than a year. Sure, I had a vague idea that there was something called a ‘gross receipt tax’ that I might need to pay, but that can wait, right? Why not read up on it later? Talk about shallow victories; when I finally faced facts and crunched the numbers, I didn’t have enough money to pay my own taxes. Oy. Say it with me now: AVOIDANCE IS FATAL.

 

5) Opening Presents Publicly

The thrill of receiving a gift can be tempered (or snuffed out) by the sudden, unpaid acting gig: obligation to act sufficiently happy to receive… whatever crazy thing you just received. Most of the time, gifts are lovely, thoughtful, and somewhere near your aesthetic preference ballpark. But it’s those few “sweet lazarus, who on EARTH would want this?!” gift-opening occasions that really stick with you, isn’t it?

 

In the past three months, I have been knuckling down and facing my fears. I’m working off my tax debt and keeping up with the math, I listen to voicemail within hours of spotting it, and started taking stick-shift lessons from an exceptionally patient friend.

Sports bras, though… might have to work up to that one.

 

Don’t leave me up here alone. What silly, harmless thing do YOU dread beyond all reason?

 

 

NOTE: Since writing this, I paid off most of my gross receipts taxes and got a drivers license. If I can change, anyone can.

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Comments

  1. I do the same thing with voicemail. I never want to check it and I dread checking it, and 90 percent of the time, its just my grandma or someone hanging up before they say anything. Why do I do that?

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  2. I also hate voicemail. What if it’s that one ex-boyfriend that still “keeps tabs” on me through the Internet, even though we aren’t speaking? What if it’s a bill collector? What if I get called into work? I also don’t answer numbers I don’t recognize for all of the above reasons.

    I always check to make sure the door is locked before bed, and I ALWAYS feel like someone is going to reach through my mail slot and grab me.

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  3. I’m glad you overcame two of your dreads! Same for me with voicemail, and really anything at all involving the phone. Texting is the way to go for me. Calling is so awful!

    I particularly dread dealing with moldy tupperware, so I’ll let it just sit there and get worse and worse until I eventually a) cowgirl up and clean it out or b) throw the whole thing in the garbage and buy new tupperware. I always say I won’t let it happen again, and yet…

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  4. We’re ALL afraid of voicemail??

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  5. Opening presents is the worst! The worst of the worst of the worst. And did you get a German license? I’m terrified to try driving down south – it’s nuts! But FR is also a super public transport-friendly town, so I haven’t had to brave it yet…

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    Rebekah Reply:

    Katie – My license seems to be… lost in the mail somewhere. I tested, I paid, the DMV/MVD says it printed and shipped my license… and months later I’ve still got nothing. Big let-down, after so many years of build-up.

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  6. I am relieved to see that I’m not the only one who hates voicemail.

    I went through a list of things that I could add to this but the truth is that they all seem perfectly reasonable to me. Like, I hate dealing with animal poop. This is not a silly, irrational hatred. Poop is gross. I also dread getting my upper lip waxed, which is again, a totally reasonable dread. So I guess I have nothing to contribute here except commiseration over the suckitude of voicemail.

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  7. For some reason, I also despise and dread checking voicemail.

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  8. Rebekah,
    I stumbled across your blog looking up conch piercings and have been reading it all morning while at work.
    I may be your Canadian doppelganger, right down to hair and skin type, things I avoid (got my license at 28, hate voicemails, present opening), deal with depression etc.
    My eyes are green though.
    Hopefully life is treating you well, just thought I would drop by and say I like what you do!

    -Meg

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    Rebekah Reply:

    OH MY GOODNESS. I want to know so much more!

    And I’m planning a post on conch piercings this week— are you considering one? I’m perfectly content with mine, would do it again in a heartbeat.

    Your American Doppelganger,

    Rebekah

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