In conversation, I refer to Ian as my “boyfriend,” despite the fact that he’s well past boyhood and our relationship is more than friendly. Manfriend? “Lover” might be more accurate (if soppy), but I’d be afraid to say it in most social settings. Should we resurrect POSSLQ? “Partner” is succinct, though vague— business partner, sex partner, life partner, some combination of the three? Male or female? Is that anyone’s beeswax but ours?
Sometimes even married folk seek new titles: one of my sisters refers to her spouse as “husbadude.”
What do you call your…. your whatever-you-call-them?