Do you remember the Kingdom Chums?
(Look, you can buy your own! This is not a recommendation!)
My siblings and I used to love this cartoon— partly for its tunes and memorable imagery, partly because we weren’t allowed to watch most other movies on Sundays.
In case you haven’t guessed or have repressed the memory, “The Original Top Ten” here refers to the Ten Commandments, each represented by a gold record and poppy song. Yes, yes, it’s all very tacky. But the Chums were voiced by Frankie Valli, Tony Orlando, Marilyn McCoo, Debby Boone, and Billy Preston. They improved matters somewhat.
Are you wondering how the Kingdom Chums explain “Thou shalt not commit adultery” in a G rated manner? With the song Be Loyal to the One You Love!
Readers, I could analyze this cartoon all the livelong day. Must all the female characters wear short skirts? If Petey and Annie are supposed to be model Christian children, why on EARTH are they so snide? Wouldn’t Annie’s voice make top-notch ipecac? How do the circular records fit in the heart-shaped carrying case? Why does Osborne get in more trouble for almost swearing than for planning to kill Petey? Is Petey’s delivery of the recurring line “uuuuuuunbelievable!” as bad as “excuuuuse me, princess,” or worse?
Notice that the only non-Christian character is also a thieving, lying bully who uses poor grammar, threatens to kill Petey AND incites the wrath of God by [almost] taking the lord’s name in vain. Charming. However, Petey does have one major weakness… I mean, apart from being verbally abusive. No spoilers here!
Did you grow up with the Kingdom Chums?
Also, would anyone care to analyze this with me, or shall we move on?